You my friend aren't the clown, you are the whole circus

Come on, come on, come on, come on.

Last semester of classes, last final exams, last time you embark on shit like that.

One more week, two exams to push through, one infernal final where I don't even know what I am supposed to know from what I am not supposed to know anymore.

Keeping it together for now, just focusing on keeping it together and not feeling uselessly about the fact that:

-I specified ahead of time that I don't know relativistic mechanics to start with, nor have I taken this class (which turned out to be the case for all the fucking physics students in that class but they pushed for it anyway because fuck knows why), and so I don't understand exactly how the quantum version of it comes into play (correction: Can't spare the time to investigate the question).

-I made it clear I was not versed in particle physics and can't for the life of me just embark on beta-decay vs deep inelastic scattering vs weak interactions vs neutronization and just know the difference to the extent of utilizing quantum practices ( I see you time dependent perturbation theory) to assess quantized collisions.

-Unless I was taking some radically different class with someone else, we didn't study scattering theory. Yet I can't find any other pointer as to starting to understand how to perform certain required tasks without any knowledge of scattering theory.

This is the last time I will have to take classes inside a school setting with high stakes.
This is the last time I am taking classes where the foundations aren't sturdy and developed enough to be able to debate with a professor over the so classic statement "You should know this from a previous class" to justify every wrong turn.
This is the last time grades will be the main reason I am pushing insanity to have a complete hold of shit I used to read in sci-fi books before tackling it in class.

Cherry on top is the ways my neighbors are coping with the exams' period:

-Doing laundry at 2h00 am (laundry is right below my bedroom)
-Moving furniture and disposing of heavy items at 3h00 am
-Stealing packages
-Dancing and doing cardio in the garden facing the building (thus facing my living room)
-Blasting David Guetta

Last one was a good one though, and if I wasn't entangled in my head and stress right now, even the cardio in the garden would have been a positive inspiration to move my body in my place.

Not there yet though.

But hey, I forgot how Guetta used to make good music!